JxHQ: You Shook Me All Night Long
by DonnaJossee
Summary: When Dr. Arkham sees something he shouldn't, it leads to Joker's escape, and a pretty rowdy celebration between him and his doctor...Harleen Quinzel. (One-shot).


_"_ _S_ _he was a fast machine, she kept her motor clean_ _  
_ _She was the best damn woman that I ever seen_ _  
She had the sightless eyes, telling me no lies  
_ _Knocking me out with those American thighs_ _  
Taking more than her share, had me fighting for air  
_ _She told me to come, but I was already there_ _  
_ _'Cause the walls start shaking, the Earth was quaking  
My mind was aching, and we were making it_ __

 _And you shook me all night long  
Yeah, you shook me all night long_ _"_

 _—_ _ **You Shook Me All Night Long**_ _, AC/DC_

"Me and my bright ideas." I grumble under my breath, tucking my shirt into my skirt quickly as J puts himself in his cuffs and sits down across from my desk. I fix my hair and step to the door, opening it to see Dr. Arkham.

"Harleen," he acknowledges me briefly before turning his attention to Joker. "Mr. Joker, we need to speak a moment."

"Ah, whatever you have to say to me you can say in front of my doctor." J, being complicated as always, smirked and Jeremiah glances at me.

"I want to save you some embarrassment." He argued and Joker let out a breathy chuckle, as if he could ever possibly be embarrassed.

"I could give a fuck." He assured him and Arkham looks at me again before sighing.

He reaches in his white coat pocket and pulls out a Zip-Lock bag, tossing it onto my desk in front of J.

I furrow my brows, trying to make out what was in the bag.

"The nurses found it in your cell after changing your bedding." Arkham informed him.

I look closer, and my face tries to keep from looking too shocked as I make out red lace and thin fabric...

"And I'm curious as to how you got your hands on a pair of women's lingerie underwear." My boss continued on and J looks at me for a split second, his lips curving into a smirk.

"Don't even think about it." I mouth to him behind Arkham. He loves causing discord and conflict, it entertains him, so I wouldn't put it past him to tell my boss I've been visiting my criminally insane and dangerous patient at night so he can fuck me until I have tears rolling down my face.

"Have you considered maybe one of your nurses caught the mood just right in my cell, rubbed one out in her panties and decided since they were soiled she'd just toss them away and go about her day?" He asked and Arkham's face twisted.

"You are one cocky prick, aren't you, _Clown_?"

Joker just stared at him and glanced at me, again.

"Or maybe I'm fucking around with one of your employees." He says and my eyes bug out and I shut my mouth tightly.

"That's not funny." Arkham gets in his face.

I see a flicker of something on J's face and he chuckles.

"You don't even know the fuckin' half of it." He said under his breath and Arkham looked at me.

"What's he talking about?"

"He's insane." I cross my arms, shooting a glare at my lover. "Completely off his rocker."

A dark glimmer shines in J's eye and he scoffs.

"Well," Arkham grabbed the panties off the table and put them back in his pocket. "Go on with your session. Sorry to interrupt."

The door slams behind him and just as soon as I turn around, J's grabbing the back of my neck and shoving me onto my desk.

"What was that about me being insane, Doctor?" He growls in my ear and I struggle against him, turning around. His hand locks around my throat and I squeeze my eyes shut a moment.

"Are you trying to get me found out for sleeping with you?" I ask him lowly and he laughs suddenly.

"Oh," he moves off me. "You're scared I'm gonna ruin what we have goin'?"

"I know you won't, because if you do...I won't help you get out." I state boldly, crossing my arms and he scoffed, walking past me to sit at my desk.

"You say that, but you would."

"And how exactly," I start, walking to him, sitting in his lap. "Do you know that?" I say lowly, cupping his face in my hands. He grins a silver smile, and I lean down to kiss him.

The door suddenly bursts open and we stare at each other. I'm shocked, unable to move, but J just looks irritated.

"How fucking convenient." He growls. I turn to see Dr. Arkham, and two security guards at the door. Arkham has a disappointed look on his face, but he also looks as though he isn't surprised.

"Having a less than professional relationship with a patient is prohibited by policy, and in this case, the law, Harleen." He told me. "You can come with us quietly, and respectfully...or you can be dragged out by your hair and sedated like we've had to do with your counterpart."

"You won't touch a hair on her head." J hissed at him and Arkham smirked.

"Harleen, now." He raised his brows at me and I looked at J.

"It's okay." I mumbled to him. He was trying to keep calm for me, but it wasn't working very well. I got up from him and walked to the door to the guards. Before I know it, I'm thrown to the floor hard enough for the breath to be knocked out of me, and my arms are being snatched behind me to be cuffed.

I hear commotion behind me, and look up just in time to see dark blood splatter and spray across my wall. The guard's suddenly off of me as their bodies hit the floor and J helps me up and takes the cuffs off of me.

Feeling panicked, I look around to see Dr. Arkham, and the two guards are laying on the floor dead.

I look up at J, my mouth open, my body shaking, threatening to shut down.

He grabs my arms firmly and makes me look at him.

"We really ain't got time for you to freak out, Kid. You're either helping me outta here or you're not."

I think for a second before nodding.

"Oh-okay." I say nervously. "What do I need to do?" I ask and he grinned from ear to ear.

"Take out every doctor you can. They trust you. I'll pick off the nurses and guards." He orders and I widen my eyes slightly.

"Take them out?" I ask him. "Murder them? You-you want me to kill them, J?"

"No I want you to calmly explain that I'm getting out of here and releasing the other inmates. Yes, I want you to kill 'em, Harls. How else am I supposed to do this without the GCPD breathing down my neck?" He cupped my face in his hands and I rubbed my lips together, really thinking about it a moment. "You say you love me so much...time to see how much you really do."

He has a point. And I can't deny he has a good one at that.

He takes my phone from my desk drawer, and gets me to unlock it before he dials a number.

"Johnny, today's a good day. I need you here ASAP. Don't worry about any backup. Me and Doc's got it covered." He tells his right hand man as he winks at me. I swallow the lump in my throat as he gets off the phone and stomps on it. "Don't need them tracking that call." He explains, making sure every part of it is beyond repairable.

I finally exhale and grab a baton from the guard's belt.

"Meet ya outside." He pats my cheek and I walk out of my office as he goes the opposite direction down the hall. I shut my door to keep the bodies concealed, and walk to Joan's office.

She looks up at me, my hands tucked behind my back, and smiles.

"Harleen, can I help you?" She asks me and I gulp.

"Um, yeah, I was wondering if you had the Joker's health chart? I couldn't find it in my drawer And Arkham mentioned you having a copy." I lie and she presses her lips together in though.

"Um, let me check really quick." She bent down to look at the bottom drawer of her desk and I approach her, slowly as she digs through the many files in it. I pull the baton from behind my back and position it at the neck of her head.

"I don't see it," as she lifts her head, I hit her in the back of the head as hard as I can and she goes limp. She's still breathing, so I hit her several more times, until she's bloodied and no longer alive.

Her blood is on my face and clothes in splatters and I feel an immense rush through me. My heart rate is hammering and my mind is blank.

I hear a gasp behind me and I look to see Dr. Stevens at the doorway.

"H-Harleen," He says gently and I roll my jaw angered with his presence.

Within minutes, he's running down the hall, two floors down from where we started, me chasing behind him. I can tell J's already come through because dead bodies littered the halls. When I finally caught up to him, it was because J got in his way. I struck him in the back, and he fell to his knees. I held the baton like a baseball bat and J moved out of the way as I swung it back and out all of my strength into hitting Steven's head like a t-ball. It made a popping noise before he fell to the floor dead, blood coming from his ear.

J looked at me like he was willing to worship the ground I walked on.

"I got everybody, staff wise." He explained and I nodded.

"Now we just gotta release everyone." I said.

"Yep." He confirmed and held up the universal key to the cells. "Well, just the ones we like, anyhow."

I smiled and plucked it from his hand and stepped to the elevator to go to the patient wing.

When we arrived, they looked at us as we walked down the hall, some of the men whistling at me and stopping when they realized J was with me. I immediately went to Ivy and stood in front of her cell.

"What the hell are you doing?" She asked me, looking at J. She pieced it together before scowling. "You slimy piece of shit." She growled to Joker. "You corrupted the one thing I actually liked about this place." She gritted her teeth. "When I get my hands on you..." she threatened him and he took the key from my hand before I could let her out.

"The plant stays." He tells me.

"J," I grab his hand. "Please? She's the one friend I actually have here. She deserves her freedom more than any of these imbeciles." I beg him and he huffs out a breath before reluctantly handing the key back to me. I let her out, keeping her from killing J.

"Here," I hand him the key. He goes to Harvey Dent's cell and lets him out. Then Killer Croc, And a whole bunch of other's. When we got everyone we wanted out, we got to the main entrance and saw Johnny in the parking lot.

"Harley," Ivy's voice stopped me before I got in the car with J. "What are you doing? Your career...everything you've worked for, you're throwing it away for him?" She asked me and I looked at him and Harvey talking briefly.

"I love him, Ivy. I really do." I say honestly. "I'd rather have him than anyone else's approval."

She looked like she didn't know what to say to that. I walked away from her and J lead me to the car. It was dark out, and it was only a matter of hours before the police caught word of the escape.

They knew all of J's hiding places, so we ended up at a run down motel in downtown. Johnny parked the car and walked in to get two rooms. When he got them, he gave me and J our key and went off to his room. We were on the second floor, and when we got to our room, J shut the door and locked it, staring at me like a hungry animal.

"What? I asked him quietly and he looked at me up and down before walking to me.

I was caught off guard when he kissed me, roughly, and pulled away to pull his jumpsuit off.

My shirt was destroyed as his ripped the fabric from me and buttons flew everywhere. I laughed, before taking my bra off. His hands pulled my skirt off as he bit into my breast with a harsh nip of his teeth. I moaned as he lifted me and I wrapped my legs around his waist. Our tongues collided hotly, dried bloody smattered amongst the both of us. I threw my head back, his hand finding my clit threw my underwear.

He chuckled at me and I whimpered, desperate for him.

"It's not funny." I managed to get out and he smiled, pulling his hand away from me. "I don't find your teasing funny—Ah!" I jolted against him, feeling him in me after sliding my panties to the side. My legs locked around him tighter as my back hit the stained wallpaper on the wall. His pace was fast, demanding, and my cries of pleasure were muffled by his shoulder as I bit into it.

He grimaced, but the pain only made him go harder, and he tangled his hand in my hair to have me where he could kiss me. His teeth sunk into my bottom lip and I started grinding against him and he drilled into me.

We eventually made it to the bed and My eyes rolled back when he went as deep as he could as my legs were on his shoulders. I pulled away from our lips being intertwined to let out a heavy moan, glancing between us to see him stretching me deliciously.

When I finally came, I was crying, and on my knees with my face against the covers as he screwed me into the mattress, his hand gripping my hair while the other left bright red marks on my ass.

He soon fell beside me, breathing heavy and i looked at him and thought about everything I had just done for him. I killed her colleagues and let Inmates out.

"Not regretting anything, are you?" He asked her calmly and i shook my head.

"Of course not." I told him truthfully.

"Your reputation is shit now, you know." He pointed out and I shrugged it off and rubbed my fingers over his forehead softly.

"I care about what you think more than what they think." I mumbled tiredly and he grinned a very tiny grin.

"That's my girl." He praised me, kissing me and I climbed on top of him and started trailing kisses from his lips to his abdomen, and lower. "God, you are going to be the death of me." He said, amused. I trail back up to his lips and grin mischievously.

"Daddy, I'm ready for round two." I bite my lip seductively and he groaned over dramatically and I laughed, taking his bottom lip between my teeth.


End file.
